Unbalanced

Unbalanced

Am I the hero or the hanged
the pariah or the devil's hand
the thought of silence that kills
or the clarity of spoken wills?

Am I real or a shooting star?
Am I near or just really far?
Is it fine to hope and yearn
or do I still have much to learn?

Am I a happy song or a tragedy
the melody of smiles or a sour malady
the crackle of lighting that glimmers
or a brew of doubts that simmers?

This is the crossroad I walk
Unbalanced and unable to talk
Is it fine to lie down and desire
or will I be burned in this fire?

The nectar of nightmares comes from the unforgiven

Your big brown eyes are like a sad malady
and your soft pale skin rouses my sense of distress
like a succubus you drain me out, I can't fight
slowly getting me deeper into a sorrowful mess.

You may never know how much of you still lives
in the thoughts that sometimes get me upset,
sweet memoirs that sting, piercing me like knives
yeah, those memories you chose to forget.

This is not a plead for you to return, lost queen.
It has been so long that you may no longer remember
that the first time your curse in my eyes was seen
was a cold afternoon on a mellow September.

I shall admit it, I am still half broken
and for that you may mock me, give my mind no rest
while at the same time, your silence becomes so outspoken
that it screams, destroys and shatters any kindness that's left.

Your voice becomes a cacophony is you're not there.
Your beauty becomes filth if beside me you don't lie
and your juices become the forbidden nectar of nightmares,
broken promises and a past that refuses to die.

My beloved melancholy

The melodies of life can turn to foggy gloom.
Not implying that I feel lost and doomed,
but just swimming in slow subtle chords
mellow arpeggios, sighs and words.

My beloved melancholy stares at my expressionless face
making sure that my feelings are always in their place.
Sensibility based on mellow and graceful sorrow
and the yearning for the past on a dim lit tomorrow.

My beloved melancholy smiles at me like a lover
after a cleverly placed kiss underneath the covers.
In some twisted way she gives me life,
soothes me and protects me from any strife.

My beloved melancholy sweetly whispers,
a sweet voice that is balm to my sores.
She tells me that I should just breathe
reminisce, feel it through my pores.

So with a couple notes end this I must
as my muse bleeds into a pale poetic tragic ending,
my verses turn to ashes and my rhymes into dust
like a soft ballad of plain old pretending.

Loneliness is glass

Loneliness is glass, reflection of a happy past,
of things you had, now things you lack.
a surface to press you cheek unto, just to ask
where is your life, where is that old spark?

Loneliness is glass, a clear thing that deceives
because fog is all that you really know
ever after the stabbing you received
when time as a dagger sank itself low.

Loneliness is glass, the shattered type
the witness of how you bleed out in grace
and the puddle you make on the floor gets ripe
as you twitch and contort your face.

Loneliness is to remember while you forget,
it is to frown while you pathetically smile.
It is the sad soft and cold wind of when the sun sets
and the night makes it all turn vile.